No YOU Shut Up And Drive

Bumper Stickers for the Modern VroomGirl

Remember when bumper stickers were fun?

by Janis Hirsch

Bumper stickers used to only appear for Presidential elections and were pretty much straight-forward: your candidate’s name and some version of the American flag. This was a simpler time, when “I Like Ike” passed for clever.

Then came the hippies who plastered their VW buses with bumper stickers full of peace signs and tie-dyed variations of “love is all you need” which code for “I smell of bong water.”

Other groups began to use bumper stickers in an effort to raise awareness of a particular problem facing society, Mothers (and everyone else, I hope) were Against Drunk Driving and war and famine and clean water and everything else that should be of universal concern but isn’t.

Lately, depending on where you live, bumper stickers have gotten ugly. What once were amusing novelties are now hate-filled rants just over your tailpipe. Yes, yes, you have a First Amendment right to spew bile all over whatever you don’t like, don’t understand and don’t want to understand.

So I’m asserting my own First Amendment right to offer up some well-informed, highly-sophisticated bumper stickers. Well, I couldn’t think of any of those but I did come up with these:

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One Response to “Bumper Stickers for the Modern VroomGirl”

  1. D.G. Fulford says:

    I Brake For No Reason and Happiness Is 25 mph Under Speed Limit Made me LOLOLOL

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